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Beginning Insight
Meditation And Other Essays Dorothy Figen Bodhi Leaves
No: 85 Copyright ©
Kandy; Buddhist Publication Society, (1988) For free distribution. This work may be republished, reformatted, reprinted and redistributed in any medium. However, any such republication and redistribution is to be made available to the public on a free and unrestricted basis and translations and other derivative works are to be clearly marked as such.
Beginning
Insight Meditation
For the beginning meditator I
believe it would be helpful to establish an order in the various steps taken in
meditation. First, then, it would be wise to establish a place of quiet to
which one may retire daily and not be interrupted in one’s endeavours. Then
wash carefully face, hands and feet. Better yet, if time permits, take a
cleansing shower and put on loose, comfortable clothes. It is wise to meditate
at the same time daily to establish a habit. I do it at 6 a.m. and again at 6
p.m. when the birds begin to retire in the evening. Then when you begin to
meditate consider your posture. With spine erect and a spirit of awareness be
mindful of sitting without strain but with complete alertness. Now you are
ready to begin. But, first, some introductory thoughts. As Sujata states in his little
book Beginning to See, “Meditation is the best thing you can do for
yourself.” However, it is far from the simple thing it may seem to beginners.
It takes a strong urge to peer deeply within oneself and beyond it. It takes
discipline and willingness to go farther than merely trying to escape or
sidestep personal problems one may have. Why meditate? There are many
reasons. But those that stand out most strongly are learning to think clearly,
and to dispel ignorance, illusion, greed, hatred and craving. This is the road
to Nirvana or Nibbana through which one must lose all clinging to “self.” The
feeling of having a self is highly resistant to extinguishing. It is persistent
and devious. Often one may feel it has vanished only to have it crop up again.
Only by diligence and persistence — and the road for many may be long — can
victory over it be achieved. You are seated now, cross-legged
on the floor, in a quiet chamber. In lotus position, if you can, or in
half-lotus, or even on a chair if disability precludes otherwise. Keep your
head erect and balanced lightly on your shoulders, but do not strain; be
comfortable, relaxed and attentive. The first stages of meditation should
be simply observation of breath. Concentrate on the nostrils where the breath
flows in... out... in... out. Be aware of the touch of air as it strikes the
passage through the nostrils. In fact be aware of everything and nothing. This
sounds contradictory. Yet it is really not. For this is no time to daydream, to
entertain vagrant and migratory thoughts. You are aware of your physical
posture. Then you forget that also. You are aware that the past is dead, that
it is gone. Specific consciousness of your whole preceding life is absent. The
future does not yet exist. All you have is “right now”... the in... out...
in... out rhythm of the breath of life. The idea is to “empty the mind,”
to get rid of all “garbage,” all fleeting and intruding thoughts. Simply to
breathe — in out — in out, never forcing the breath. You are not even the
breather, but the breathing breathing you, the you, which as time goes on, will
grow more and more vague as it begins to dissipate, disappear. Just allow the mind to feel the “touch”
of breath as it flows in and flows out. In your first sessions think of nothing
more. You will find the breath thinning out as it becomes more subtle and finer
until in time you begin to feel you are not breathing at all. This is the
calming of the breath flow. It becomes very pleasant and satisfying. I keep a candle burning in the
meditation chamber. It serves two purposes, maybe three. At first, if the mind
wanders, it serves as a point of focus. The eyes, at first observing the
candle, soon close, lightly, easily, by themselves. But even through closed
lids one feels the presence of the light. One can see it in one’s mind’s eye.
It restores the mind’s wandering back to the present. The second purpose is
symbolic: to me it signifies the Light of the Dhamma, the doctrine on
which the meditation is based. And finally, it makes for a pleasant, lovely
atmosphere. Incense, flowers, Buddha sculpture are nice but really not
necessary. One can, in truth, meditate anywhere, any quiet place where
there can be no interruption. Wherever you meditate, if it is at home and you
have a telephone, it is wise to remove the receiver to avoid incoming calls. Bear in mind that the place of
meditation is not of key importance, but it is wise to return to the same place
at the same time daily so that the habit of meditating becomes established. The
Buddha meditated under a Bodhi tree where he achieved enlightenment. An
advanced meditator can choose almost any place and it will serve his purpose —
a crowded market place, a burial ground, a cave, a park or a refuse dump. In
his inward turning he becomes totally oblivious of his surroundings; or,
contrariwise, makes the very surroundings, as he advances deeper and deeper
into meditating, the subject of his thoughts. The important thing to remember
is that these thoughts must be schooled and channelled. They must be kept “on
centre.” But you, now, are still in your
beginning stages. Untoward thoughts will persist in entering your mind. This is
only natural. You will be amazed at how many and how trivial these intrusions
can be. You must learn, however, to treat these intruders with courtesy. Do not
shove them away in anger. Be gentle, kindly. Label each one — past — present —
future? Worthy? Unworthy? Animosity? Vanity? Desire? Egotism? Your very act of
branding them will assist in their cessation. As they begin to disappear, your
mind will gently return to your nostrils, your breathing. It will grow quieter
and quieter. Other hindrances will obtrude
themselves. Noises will penetrate your consciousness — children playing and
shouting, buses or airplanes passing. Label them as you do other passing
thoughts. Keep centering on the breathing, the slowing inflow, outflow. In time
the noises, too, will vanish. Whenever you find yourself “out there,” bring
yourself gently back to “here” and to “right now.” When you have been able to
accomplish this “no thought” for at least a half hour, your breathing will have
slowed to a point of almost indistinguishable rhythm, to “it” breathing “you” and
not the other way around. I find it helps in all of this to
keep a semi-smile on my face such as that of the Buddha. It aids in brightening
the mind, makes it happier. At this point in your beginning
meditation, if you have been at it a half hour or longer, you may terminate it
if you wish or continue as before. Or you can go on to extend metta or
loving-kindness. This meditation subject is good because it eliminates
hatred, envy, anger and self-pity. It accomplishes love for all, destruction of
self, sympathetic joy, and a good feeling for every being that lives or has
left this life. Your extension of loving-kindness should reach out to encompass
the earth, the universe. You will find it difficult in time, to snuff out the
life of even the smallest insect. In extending loving-kindness it is
of great importance that you first love yourself. In the right way, of
course. You accomplish this by ridding your thoughts of all “impurities.” Think
to yourself “I will rid my mind of every defilement: anger, hatred, ignorance,
fear, greed, craving. I will make my mind clear, fresh and pure. Like a
transparent window is my mind. Then with my stain-free mind, I pour out
thoughts of loving-kindness, of love and of kindness.” Try to get a mental image of each
one you are extending this loving-kindness to. Get into that person.
Feel his or her personality enter your own being and direct your feeling
straight into the mind and heart of that individual. You will find in time,
that there is a sort of mental telepathy emerging. You will feel the warmth of
response. Do not dwell on this. Go on to the next person and the next and next.
Bring forth all the warmth and kindness of your spirit and instil this into the
being it is directed toward. If you do this once or twice daily, your horizon
will widen. You will find yourself directing these vibrations to all
beings who have entered your consciousness, without exceptions. This will
include brand-new acquaintances you hardly know. People you do not even know
but see pass by regularly or irregularly down the street. All who live. All who
have died. Known and unknown. All animals, insects, trees. And in this
outflowing there will ride your self, vanishing into the all-inclusive. When you have completed this
meditation sitting, later try a walking meditation, and, in this,
think of the Four Noble Truths of the Buddha; that all beings are born to
suffer, etc. Then go on to find the “way out”; the way out and the “end” of
suffering. Find this secure path and incorporate it into your daily life, and,
this accomplished, find Nibbana right here on earth!
A
Personal Observation
When I first came to Sri Lanka
from America, I had just about given up all hope of living. The doctors in
America had provided me with maybe twenty-five different drugs for a very bad
heart condition and other ailments. We fled America, my husband and I, to live
out our lives among peaceful surroundings — in the heart of Buddha-land.
Shortly after arrival, what with the long trip and thoughts of death, I truly was
dying. I had a myocardial infarction and was taken to the hospital. I found the
hospital conditions so deplorable, I felt it would be better to die in bed at
home. Consequently, I left the hospital. My husband had found a lovely home for
us and there I waited to die. After much pain and emotional upheaval my husband
found an
anagarika, a Buddhist lay brother, who came to our home and
performed a miracle, or to state it better, pointed out to me the “path” that I
shall follow for the rest of my days here on earth. This monk-like follower of
the Buddha, the Anagarika Tibbotuwawa, instructed me in meditation. We went through four stages and in
time I threw out all drugs, and the life “here and now” became clear and
meaningful. Many strange things began to occur in the course of meditation.
First I began to feel that I was on another plane of consciousness. I no longer
had a self, sick or otherwise. I was at one with all, all of us in a new world.
I found that the “ego” that nearly wrecked my life was now gone. I felt reborn,
and extended my meditation to vibrations of loving-kindness. Thought messages I
call them. Then one morning a friend called from America. On the phone he said
that he had received my message. He was elated beyond belief, thanked me and
promised to come here in the near future. The strangest of all was a
telegram from my sister. She asked if we could accommodate her at our home in
three weeks. I nearly had a heart attack! My sister is seventy-eight years old.
I had heard no word from her for fifteen years. Yet I had been sending her
“thought messages” of loving-kindness, and her image was growing clearer and
clearer. She was “with me” even before arrival. She travelled half-way around the world to see me, and
when she arrived she said she had had a compelling urge to see me. We were both
delighted and, to my amazement, she meditated each evening with me and said she
had never known such “peace and love” as she found in our home. Unfortunately,
she could not remain with us, as I had hoped, but she left feeling better able
to cope with responsibilities at home .
She added as she left, “I have promises
to keep — and many miles to go before I sleep.” These few experiences have been so
uplifting that now, even though I never proselytize, many young people
come to me for instruction in meditation. Recently a young man from Switzerland
came to our home. He felt he was dying of rabies (“rabbits” he called it in
broken English). I was so sure he did not have this disease that I suggested
that he meditate with me and Anagarika that evening, and he seemed pleased with
the experience. Well, this young man came not only each evening for the next
three weeks, but also every morning at 5:30 a.m. bringing fresh flowers for the
Buddha. He left, after three weeks of intensive meditation and instruction and
reading of the Dhamma, well and happy and full of ideas to help suffering
humanity. There are, of course, many ideas I
have omitted which are advanced procedures in insight meditation, the three
stages which usually follow the concentration on breathing. These are body,
feelings, perceptions and consciousness, ultimately expressing themselves in
“the mind experiencing pure mind.” I feel, however, that the reader can find
these steps in many publications that have been released on this subject. If
this booklet helps the beginner with just a little insight into the “way” and
the “why” of meditation, this will be my happiness.
Is
Buddhism a Religion?
This is a question which is often
asked. It really depends upon how one defines religion. If it is thought of as
a belief in a supreme being to whom one prays for redemption, security, favours
or relief from suffering, then, no, Buddhism is not a religion. The Buddha himself never claimed
divinity — only clear-sightedness and purity of apprehension of truth through
deepest intuition, leading to equanimity and enlightenment. He was a great and
rare individual but not a god. If some simple and mistaken few have elevated
him to godship and worship him with requests for favours and special
dispensations, this does not alter the situation one bit. It seems that in these troubled
times, as, indeed, since time immemorial, man has felt the need to have a faith
in a supreme being, one who could redeem him from “sin” and relieve his suffering.
This is a great fallacy. If indeed there were such a being, why should he be
asked to give redemption? Isn’t it more important for man to redeem himself?
This is what the Buddha believed. Man, he said, is born to suffering. Life is
suffering. That is the first of the Four Noble Truths he enunciates — that
there is suffering. In the Second Truth he points out that all suffering
has its origins which we must learn to understand, because this is the only way
we can arrive at the Third Truth, which is that cessation of this suffering can
be achieved. His Fourth Truth clarifies the way out from suffering via the
Eightfold Path which we will discuss later. Therefore we ask, if Buddhism is
not a religion, what then is it? Our reply is: Buddhism is a way of life, a
philosophy, a psychology, a way of thinking, through which we may ourselves
take on the responsibility of determining how our life-bearing kamma (karma)
will work out for us. Meditation is one of the procedures of mental discipline
and purification through which we may begin to learn such responsibility. Many young people have come to me
saying, “How can I embrace Buddhism without destroying my own beliefs and
culture?” I tell the Christians among them to think about the precepts of
Christ. Are they so totally opposed to, and different from, those of the
Buddha? Thou shalt not kill. Thou shalt not steal or commit adultery. The
ethical injunctions among the Ten Commandments — are they not almost exactly
the same as the precepts of the moral life laid down by the Buddha (the Five
Precepts)? I tell them that the Dhamma, the
sacred texts of Buddhism, is much more voluminous and explicit than those of
the Old and New Testaments and commentaries. The Buddhist texts are, in fact,
eleven-fold as extensive and contain an enormous range of wise teachings, none
of them derogatory to the faiths of other creeds. He did not deny the existence
of deities, but he did reserve scepticism as to the infinity of their duration,
their omnipotency, their powers to help mankind in every kind of urgency. Have
these gods and messiahs, which we of Western faiths have been prone to believe
in, been sublimely successful in the mitigation of human suffering, hunger,
sorrow and affliction? The answer is open to doubt. So to these young Christians I can
say, “Believe in Christ if you wish, but remember, Jesus never claimed divinity
either.” Yes, believe in a unitary God, too, if you wish, but cease your
imploring, pleading for personal dispensations, health, wealth, relief from
suffering. Study the Eightfold Path. Seek the insights and enlightenment that
come through meditative learnings. And find out how to achieve for yourself
what prayer and solicitation of forces beyond you are unable to accomplish. There are many young people who
believe that God answers their prayers. Does he? Is prayer-answering the
purpose of a supreme being? A young man recently came to us asking for food and
shelter. He was young, able-bodied, and, yes, intelligent. We received him, fed
him and gave him a room for several days. When it became apparent that this
fellow had no intention of ever leaving, we felt he should go off on his own.
He was highly indignant! When he left we asked him if he intended to work and
earn enough to take care of his own needs. He answered, “No, God will provide.
If I follow his light, that is enough. He will take care of me!” If there is a God, why should he
take care of able-bodied young men simply because they have unreserved and
total faith in him, when there are so many unfortunate, desolate people who
really need help? Did God provide for the millions of Jews in concentration
camps who were slowly gassed to death en masse, their agonies of
asphyxiation often lasting a full half-hour, before they were incinerated in
German ovens? Is he there offering respite each day to the millions who are
dying of cancer and other agonizing diseases? Does he provide for all the
masses of people, victims of floods, disasters and earthquakes, who are
homeless and starving daily throughout the world? Yes, believe in a God, if you
will, I tell them, but don’t ask, ask and ask. Don’t beg. Provide, as best you
are able, for yourself first. Then fill your heart and mind with love, with
metta, and help, to the fullest possible extent, in the relief of suffering
among others. This is the answer I give them. But cease your petitioning, your
constant solicitation for private preference. A Jewish girl from Israel came to
meditate. She felt happy and calm in meditation, but she was worried. She said,
“I do not want to forget my heritage. I was born in Jerusalem and am steeped in
Jewish tradition.” I answered her, “No problem. When you finish meditating, say
the ‘Shmah’!” This is the ancient prayer of the Jews to be said each morning of
their lives and on their deathbeds. It consists of the words, “Hear, O Israel,
the Lord our God, the Lord is one.” This, to those of the Jewish faith, may be
a solacing thought, one that may yield them comfort, I told her. There is
nothing in Buddhism, as a matter of fact, denying the right to believe in God
if you so wish. Yet it must be pointed out that Buddhism places deityship on
quite a different plane than monotheistic and polytheistic religions do. Still,
with all your beliefs intact, you can benefit from much that Buddhism teaches,
for instance from Buddhist meditation. We are all inter-related in common
suffering. Even the word religion, derived from Latin, means joined or
linked. Just as the word yoga also means the same, united.
Whether this is expressed through a belief in a deity or not is of less
importance than the fact that we recognize and accept the wonder of our common
interrelationship. Certainly, I told her, there is nothing in the practice of
Judaism that denies man’s common relationship. The young lady was satisfied. As
far as I know she still meditates daily and recites the “Shmah.” Sometimes it is said that the
Buddhists worship idols. Why all the incense, oil lamps, flowers set before
Buddha-images? You must understand, I tell these young people, that the Buddhists
are merely expressing their reverence for a great man of overwhelming vision
and insight, one of the wisest teachers that ever lived, a man who laid out a
whole way of life an a means of alleviating sorrow, strife and suffering. When
they bow to him with hands clasped before them they do so in reverence and
worship. But the meaning they attach to “worship” is not that of Western
religionists. They ask nothing for their separate selves, no intercession of
gods, no personal favours. Why is that? Because the Buddhist, neither in his
life practice nor his philosophy, believes himself to be a separate being, a
singular self, apart from others. Therefore, lacking separate personhood, there
is no one for whom preference is sought. For the Buddhist, “worship” then
means praise, reverence, a desire to imitate and be like the Buddha, to follow
his ways and show appreciation for his teachings. He offers them no
dispensations or favours, only a body of wisdom contained in the Dhamma which,
if they but apply it to themselves, amounts to self-dispensation. In essence
this means dispensing with all vanity, clinging, attachments, greed and
ignorance, which hampers them from being like the Buddha and aspiring to the
perfection which he in his life attained when reaching Nibbana here and now! The great American statesman
Thomas Paine said, “My mind is my church.” In this statement he reiterates the
teaching of the Buddha. Buddhists do not believe it is necessary to have a
middleman intercede between them and the perfection of the Master they chose to
emulate. In Buddhism there is no need for priests, ministers and preachers to
pray for them in churches or temples. The Buddhist monk teaches, not preaches.
He teaches man to find his way. He teaches purity of mind, and compassion, and
love for all beings. He does not perform marriage services, but devotes his
life only to teaching and scholarship and study, and to continuing
self-purification through meditation so that he can be an example to others. Who may become a Buddha? And how
does one become one? These are questions frequently asked me. The answers are
that one has to enrol or join nothing, sign no document, be initiated by no
baptism, nor disavow any other belief. All he has to do is to begin to live as
Buddhists live, to find inspiration in the Buddha, to like and reverence his
teachings, to begin to try to follow his Eightfold Path and, through
meditation, to seek to gain merit and purity. To aspire, in fact, to become a
Buddha himself! For Buddhahood is not a limited society. It is open to all.
Many have attained it. Even the Buddha himself in previous lives (so goes one
of the legends built around him) chose to deny himself release through Nibbana
and took rebirth so that he might stay on and teach others. Now let us examine the Buddha’s
remedy for the ending of suffering. A friend of mine once said, with respect to
this, “It is all very simple: practice right thought, right speech
and right action!” Very good and very important. However, not so fast,
my friend! All of the Eightfold Path is necessary, not just the small part of
it you mention. It is all beautifully interrelated. There must be right
understanding with right speech. There must be right action. There must
be right effort. And with the right effort must follow right
livelihood. And for all of these steps to work, think of them as steps.
You don’t get very far just moving up one step and remaining there. You have to
combine them, join them, link them, and finally, climax them with still one
more step to reach the top. And that step is right mindfulness. How beautifully all these hang
together like pearls on a necklace. But now think for a moment about what is
meant by “right”: that is to say, the rightness of speech, thought, action. Few
pause to think what “right” means within this context. Does it mean right as
opposed to wrong? Perhaps it does. And then, again, perhaps it doesn’t. How
many of us are able to discriminate at every juncture of our lives what is
right and what is wrong? Does right, then, mean appropriate? Appropriate
action, appropriate speech, etc.? Appropriate means suitable, suitable for the
occasion. Is that always so easy to determine? What, then, does the
Buddha’s use of the word right come down to? Does it not come down to
the fact that he is pointing out that there is choice, and that we have
choice, that we can go this way or go that way, and that it is up to us and not
him, and no god or supreme being, to determine our way? Is he not saying that
this choice or volition amounts to our own kamma? And that while a lot of it is
predetermined through our past lives or genetically, however you want to think
of it, we can still alter, correct, change, refine, re-aim this kamma, change
its course? We and nobody else! And does not all of this point back to such qualities
of action, speech, and thought, as are characterized as greedy, selfish,
hateful, hostile, hurtful as opposed to such qualities as generousness,
selflessness, lovingness, kindliness, helpfulness? Do you not see that the
Buddha is telling us to look behind words and not to accept them for their face
value but for their internal, shall we say nuclear, meanings? So we return again to the question
as to whether Buddhism is a religion. In the sense that it offers us a moral
code helping to conjoin us in the living together of a better life, yes, it is
a religion. For that is the inner or nuclear meaning of religion — relinking,
rejoining. But if religionis taken to imply belief in a supreme being who
rules the universe and can be bribed to alter his decisions by our prayers and
solicitations for personal preference, Buddhism is not a religion. This Buddhism does not do. Well, then, the
Christian may argue, man without God, , without a ruler of the universe, that
is, without conscience, will revert to bestiality. But is this not like saying
a being cannot exist without a taskmaster? Are we then children? So weak that
we can’t exist without being “told” what we can and cannot do? How can we
justify this? The answers are obvious. Man can
rely on himself. Man can train his mind to right thinking, not because
thereby he will be saved by a righteous God, but because right thinking will
lead him on to the path of final liberation from suffering, which consists of
right moral conduct, right meditation and right wisdom. Let us look at Buddhism. Does it
not look up to you rather than down to you, treat you as an adult rather
than a child, not demand and command, but patiently teach and instruct? The
Buddha states that we are heirs to our kamma; that we make it and that what we
do in this existence does affect our lives in the next one. However, in
Buddhism, there is no need to beat our breasts and heed authoritarian demands
that we repent. We can rise up out of our sloth and torpor, out of evil and
ugliness, by “following the path.” If it were true that without a vengeful God,
man would be less than human, how do we justify the existence of Buddhists
living in peace and love with each other for thousands of years? Christ and Buddha were alike in
many ways. It is not my intention to disparage anyone’s belief in Christ.
Christ said, “Love thy neighbour as thyself.” Buddha said, “Show compassion and
loving-kindness to all beings.” God said to the Jews, “Do not unto others that
which you would not do unto yourself.” This is what Christ later said in
reverse, positively, but with the same meaning. It was Moses who interpreted
the words of God to his people, but for that reason they did not clothe him in
divinity, nor did he do so himself. Where the Buddhists and Christians part
company is that Christ’s followers accord him divinity, whereas Buddha’s
disciples accord him reverence as a great being.
Why
Is There Suffering in the World?
Buddha taught (and I refer to The
Buddha, for there have been many and you, yourself, may have the aspiration to
one day be one), that it is man’s clinging to the idea of separate selfness
which is the cause of his suffering. Implicit in separate selfhood is egotism
and craving. This is illusion, the basic illusion. The man who “prays to God”
expresses craving. He is a clinger. He wishes something for self, is
egotistic. Even the idea of a God expresses the thought of an extension of his
egotism into a future life — in heaven or wherever. The prayer craves for a
beautiful pain-free future or continuation of the present. In return he
promises his God to be of good behaviour. Buddha teaches that beauty is
fleeting; life is impermanent and transitory; that pain and sorrow are an
outcome of the craving egotistic self. That craving is our suffering.
Craving implies cravenness. To be craven is to fear. Fearfulness is suffering.
Life is fearful. There is suffering in the world
because the fearful, fearing self continues in its illusion of lonely
separateness. The separate self clings to its fears, its self-seeking, its
pleading, hoping, craving. “Give me,” it implores its God, “Help me.” What is
the Buddha’s answer to this? Does he not say, “Cleanse yourself of the
self-idea, of its greed, hatred, ignorance”? And what is this ignorance? Is it
not our ignoring, our refusal to see the basic illusion of selfhood? We finally return to meditation
again, to why we meditate. Meditation is a way, the Buddha’s way of
self-cleansing, self-elimination, of freeing the mind of its attachments to the
impermanent and illusory. Through meditation we learn to detach the self from
its assumptions, to realize that ego is substance-less, to free our mind from
its defilements and illusions; to approach, through wisdom and compassion, the
ultimate cessation of suffering which comes with Nibbana, the utter abandonment
of our selfhood. In this no eternity is sought, no endless continuity. And no
annihilation. For, since there is no one, what is there to annihilate?
Or to eternalize? In a way of thinking, is not this
a kind of sublime mysticism? A creed or belief that yields unseeking
equanimity, quietude and the end of suffering? Since all being, in the end, is
mystery; since trembling, transitory being is but an illusory drop of water in
a depthless ocean, why not accept it as so? Those who crave for and pray to
gods often achieve thereby a kind of mental purification. Even the prayers of
sceptics often achieve the same result. If prayer brings relief and quietude,
remission of suffering, it cannot be bad. But what if the relief is unlasting?
Apart from the notion that prayer implies a dependency on external or
supernatural authority, which I have no reason to bring into question, it
definitely is based on the idea of a self as opposed to an other, and of
bringing the two together in a sort of bargaining process. But what if we can
accept the idea that there is no self to begin with and therefore no one to do
the bargaining? I am reminded, in conclusion, of a little story: A Christian missionary found a
Chinese priest chanting in a temple. When the Chinese had finished, the
missionary asked him: “To whom were you praying?” “To no one,” replied the Chinese
priest. “Well, what were you praying for?”
the missionary insisted. “Nothing,” said the Chinese, The missionary turned away,
baffled. As he was leaving the temple the Chinese added kindly, “And there was
no one praying, you know!” I have learned that through
meditation one comes to appreciate vistas of truth in no other way attainable;
and that if one does not come to understand totally and unquestionably the
fullest depths of meaning possible as to the causes of suffering, one does at
least arrive by painful experience and mindfulness to comprehension of its
imponderability and immensity. I see it in a personal way, in my seventh
decade, in severe and frequent anginas, in arthritic pains which make sittings
so difficult that I must frequently change positions during meditation, or do
standing meditation. I see it in my deafened and daily worsening hearing, the
dimming of my eyes and in the realization that in the course of minding my
breath and giving consideration to the dissolution of every component of my
body, anicca, impermanence, is the source out of which this suffering or
dukkha flows. Out of this impermanence, too, I sense the vastness of the
illusion that we possess anything life-abiding, a continuous and
distinguishable selfhood and that the epitome of suffering arises from this
basic illusion — that there is a “one,” a “self” which is suffering or
sufferable. The fact of suffering, its truth,
and the fact of impermanence as well, are widely recognized by most religions.
All accept the basic tragical quality of life. Where Buddhism goes forward from
the rest is in the maintenance and espousal of the theme of no-self. Life,
death, impermanence and suffering then become but a process in which, in an
ultimate and fundamental sense, there is no personal participation. From this
notion comes release, emancipation and enlightenment. As phenomena we may
continue to go on until the ultimate collapse of our bodies and death overtakes
us. But since no self is any longer engaged in the process, it becomes
depersonalized. We are no longer subjects or even objects of calamity, despair,
disease. Disturbance, dejection, worry, dread, anguish, decay, enfeeblement,
senility, no longer concern us. Serenity and equanimity come with a new wisdom
reflecting our detachment not alone from these negative emotions but also from
the positive ones such as longing, craving, hoping, desiring, wishing,
clinging. Because, whether we realize and attain the positive results or goals
sought through these emotions or do not, there is continued suffering. We
suffer if we fail to attain them and there is disappointment. If we do attain
them, they are impermanent, suffer their own kind of decay, and out of this
loss we suffer as well. The goal, in the end, becomes the
even-minded depersonalized middle course wherein irritation, aversion,
uncertainty vanish. Hate and animosity become impossible. One is neither submissive
nor rebellious. We transcend the need for personal love or hate. Quietude comes
to us. Release. These are the goals of insight or vipassana meditation, whose
aim is release from suffering. How close we come to realizing them will depend
on the quality of those we seek out to teach us and on our own assiduity in the
mindfulness with which we seek, through our meditation, to arrive at the other
shore. — §§§ — THE BUDDHIST PUBLICATION SOCIETY The BPS is an approved charity dedicated to making known the Teaching of the Buddha, which has a vital message for all people. Founded in 1958, the BPS has published a wide variety of books and booklets covering a great range of topics. Its publications include accurate annotated translations of the Buddha’s discourses, standard reference works, as well as original contemporary expositions of Buddhist thought and practice. Thesse works present Buddhism as it truly is—a dynamic force which has influenced receptive minds for the past 2500 years and is still as relevant today as it was when it first arose. For more information about the BPS and our publications, please visit our web site, or contact: The Administrative Secretary — §§§ — |